Bazooka

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Tuesday night (Nov. 13) was a who’s who slice of the local, regional, and international garage rock scene. Slovenly Records artists Bazooka (of Athens, Greece) and Paint Fumes (of Charlotte, N.C.) headlined as local rockers Borings Portals took the Tin Roof stage first and set the scene for one of Charleston’s rare nights of pure psychedelic freak out.


All three acts cranked the reverb and fuzzy amps to 11 and stomped on overdrive pedals. The vocals had enough reverb to seem beamed in from outer space — the perfect vocal sound for each shouting singer.


Paint Fumes’ Elijah Von Cramon thrashed out rhythmic guitar chords as he jumped up to the microphone to sing each Fumes rocker. Guitarist Brett Whittlesey played blistering leads that stretched onto what seemed like every fret. Drummer Josh Johnson pounced wildly on a kit of a snare, tom, kick, and crash. Paint Fumes played “Panic Attack” and “Egyptian Rats” from their 7-inch, and from their LP Uck Life, they played the title track along with “Surf Party Apocalypse” and “Walkin’.”


Bazooka was the most rhythm-driven group with double drummers and thundering double rhythm guitars. They performed at near-deafening volume, as did each act. The Greek quartet delivered such songs as “Shame Take My Brain,” “Ravening Trip,” and “Zed the Mythical Goat,” some of which have recently been released on a 7-inch. The crowd cheered and danced with enthusiastic gusto for each band.


While the show was everything fans of trashy garage-punk could hope for in Charleston, the real story of these bands is the after-party. It was shifted from its original downtown location because one of the hosts’ roommates had to work early the next day. It’s a good thing for her the party was moved because it became an all-night rave at Dence’s house a few streets away.


Everyone’s ears were still ringing from the show, which meant everyone was speaking at volumes louder than normally necessary. Somewhere in the haze, members of Bazooka, whose English was incredibly proficient, explained that the scene in Greece is mostly heavy metal. They are friends with fellow Athens rockers Acid Baby Jesus, another pysch-garage band who in May played in Charleston at the Royal American with Paint Fumes, Boring Portals, and the Lean Few. Bazooka member John Vulgaris was the recording engineer of the Acid Baby Jesus LP, also released on Slovenly.


Those were the last sounds coming the most rock ‘n’ roll party in Charleston I have ever been to. - Metronome | Charleston

For a while, I was grotesquely obsessed with any fuzzy grimy garage rock hailing from the great European motherland. It all started with the perfect Athenian garage act, Acid Baby Jesus, which led to another noisy, distracting punk act called Bazooka. The name makes you think of things like war and bubblegum and maybe some kind of cartoon character, but now you’ll think of sexually deprived Athenian punks making a lot of noise with dual guitars battling it off with two drum sets which ultimately results in one of the tightest sounding punk acts I’ve heard in quite some time.

Every track on their demo is absolutely perfect and will leave you feeling like you just spent a month in a hole in the ground with nothing but some meth and 27 virgins resembling Oprah Winfrey. The best track on the demo might be, “I Want To Fuck All The Girls In My School,” which also takes the cake for the most obscene / awesome track name. The track opens with deep penetrating percussion layered with droning guitars and the creepiest slimiest vocals that suddenly burst into a surprisingly catchy chorus that almost feels a bit poppy. It feels wrong and dirty, but it’s in the best possible way. Lookout for an upcoming 7? US release on Black Gladiator and another 7? release on France’s Inch Allah Records. And the art by Yorgos Tourlas is pretty killer, too. Dreamy threesomes.-- Krissy Rubbles - International Tapes

I Want To Fuck All The Girls In My School, Slovenly

I used to love the Hercules TV show when I was young. You know, with Kevin Sorbo. And even Bruce Campbell was in it (and in Xena Warrior Princess also). I used to love all the Greek Gods. But now, Greek gods have been replaced! Replaced by FUCKIN’ AMAZING BANDS!!! Acid Baby Jesus was maybe one of the first bands to put Greece back on the map but now we also have BAZOOKA!! Great no-wave punk band, that makes me think of the A-Frames and early Intelligence. And they sing about important stuff. I mean, who didn’t want to fuck all the girls in the school? SERIOUSLY! WHO?????

-Tony LoFi - One Chord Progression

By: Tim Baker | Album Rating: 9

Bazooka has boiled down the purpose of 99% of all the music ever made with the title of their three-song EP on Slovenly Records. The aptly titled I Want To Fuck All The Girls In My School.

It is refreshing to see that kind of honesty and balls in a world filled with market research and PC mindsets. When you throw in the fact that I Want To Fuck All The Girls In My School kicks a major shit ton of ass, well then you are really cooking with gas mi hermonos.

I Want To Fuck All The Girls In My School starts off with what sounds like a colony of bees being run through a buzz saw. The guitars in the opening track are much more mid 80s crossover thrash than they are catchy garage styling’s offered throughout the rest of the EP. In a lot of ways it reminds me of something off of S.O.D's landmark album Speak English of Die. With the minor exception being that the vocals are more art punk/garage than angry-chubby-white-guy punk.

The second track, Monkey Time is catchy as shit. From the second it starts it gets my toes tapping and my head bouncing. Good straight forward garage rock filled with blistering riffs, infectious hand claps and indecipherable lyrics that sound as amazing as they do incomprehensible. In a lot of ways it sounds like the type of thing the early 2000s "the" bands were going for but mostly failing at1. It is powerful, fun and makes me want to do whippets with My high school friends who took town jobs.

The last track is titled Tingle and has a very art rock meets garage vibe to it. Kinda like if The Talking Heads were filming The Minutemen and Keith Morris era Black Flag making voyeur porn. The vibe is all 80s So-Cal punk run through the slowed down filter of Austin noodle core. I know that sounds like a total clustetFuck yet somehow, it works perfectly and might actually be the best track of the bunch.

With I Want To Fuck All The Girls In My School, Bazooka has wet the appetite and made me hungry for more. It is just the kind of exciting transfusion of straight forward rock n' roll that I have been jonesing for and like all good fixes, one hit is never enough.

1Out of all the 2000s "the" band I will always stand behind The Hives who had the best album of the bunch with Veni Vidi Vicious, but were unfairly criticized for being inauthentic. I feel this is because they were Swedish and it is impossible for those people to seem like anything other than replicants with their turtle neck sweaters and hip length leather jackets. - SYFFAL

By Lisa Parisi

Oh Greece, you bring us the concept of democracy, the skull-breaking Spartans, the bombshell Aphrodite, and—what now?—a whole host of dazzling garage rock bands… Well done, you, well done. One of the latest imports from the lovely, scuzzy greatness that is sLOVEnly (did you notice the word love was in there?), is Bazooka’s—the two drummer, four-piece powerhouse that hails from Athens—EP entitled I Want to Fuck All the Girls in My School.

Crashing cymbals start the title track. Then enters a drone-y guitar, the vocals are slurry and fuzzy—is this the babble of a zombie? What does he want? To eat your brains, have his way with the cheerleading squad, hoist a revenge of the zombie rock and roll nerds… seems likely. “I Want to Fuck All the Girls in My School” is mumble-y, but in that endearing kind of way, and the drums feature prominently in this kooky, spooky world of hooliganism. You know these Athenians are up to pure mischievousness, as if the title didn’t make that apparent. I mean, we aren’t gonna get murdered (I think) but something off-kilter is looming in the fog—probably just juvenile delinquency and fooling around, but we sure as hell aren’t gonna be home by curfew. Best part: those damn “ooooooo, ooooo, ooooo, ahhhhh, ooooooo, ahhhh ahh ahh ah ahhhhh’s”—someone was eating the microphone, which is tastier than brain stew.

“Monkey Town” is the definition of ferocious. Goodbye to the spooky land of “I Want to…”(we survived) and hello to our home turf of snotty vocals, distortion, shrills, rapid chord changes, whirlwind beats, head bopping, and that warm apple pie feeling of good ol’ punkish rock and roll. It’s a short ditty, but that’s ok, that’s what repeat buttons are for; or better yet, pick up that needle on your turntable and move it back a few grooves, it always sounds better on wax anyways. Closing with “Tingle”, the fierce, high-pitched metal-ish riffs obscure what might be a spaceship landing in the background. Where the metal tangos with the punk, we have a loud, in-your-face cacophony of, well, fierceness—both musically and in attitude; someone got busted, their true colors are showing. I don’t know if I would want to cross this crew, they have bazookas, you know… Godspeed, offender, Godspeed.

So, what’s great about Bazooka’s delectable EP? We’ve partook in a revenge of the zombie nerds, ate some rock and roll pie with monkeys, and got a dose of sci-fi, metal-ish revenge all under the veneer of loud, pummeling, rocking rancor. Now if that isn’t a nice expedition, then I don’t know what is. Dig into your linty pockets and scrounge up $4.75 for the record, available through our disheveled loves over at Slovenly. - GET BENT

By Tim Baker

Slovenly Records has quickly become one of my favorite labels. Their roster is crammed to the gills with really amazing punk and garage bands from all over the world that are making us 'Merican types look like giant glitter covered pussies. One of my favorite Slovenly artists is Bazooka, a Greek outfit that stays true to the labels manifesto of "Pure Punk and Hairy Armenian Types".

Bazooka recently dropped their amazing EP I Want To Fuck All The Girls In My School, which is really quite quaint since they no longer have school in Greece thanks to their stellar economic policies. Ahh the good ole days.

Anyway I recently sat down with these delicious olive oil covered savages and hashed it out. It turns out that they are just like our gutter punks – smelly, urine soaked, full of sass, and most importantly – Adorable.

SYFFAL INTERVIEWS BAZOOKA – GO!

SYFFAL: Our readership is most famous for being part of a mass movement of plushy sex addicts who have trouble reading through their sex costumes and shame, for some reason they have decided to turn to us for all of their music needs. So in order to help us help them please answer the following: Who the Fuck are you?

Bazooka (BZK): We are the descendants of the great ancient Greek civilization fucked by Christianity.

SYFFAL: Who does what in your band?

BZK: Xanthos plays the guitar and sings, Billy plays the guitar and struggles to sing backing vocals, John and Plathios are playing drums and sing backing vocals

SYFFAL: If you were able to be a cast member of any 1980s teen sex romp which one would it be and why?

BZK: Jeff Spicoli from Fast Times at Ridgemont High because he was the classroom stoner.

SYFFAL: Everyone knows the only acceptable Fast Times cast member is Brad or Damone. Your EP I Want To Fuck All The Girls In My School is a delicious garage punk offering that makes me long for doing whippets with my friends that still live in their parents basements. Is that what you were gunning for? If not what were you hoping to achieve? And if so, what the Fuck is wrong with you?

BZK: Actually our goal was to make a record for decent families that enjoy getting high on LSD. And what the Fuck is wrong with you sucking gas out of a can?

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