Crack Whore Galore
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Crack Whore Galore

Hollywood, California, United States | SELF

Hollywood, California, United States | SELF
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"CRACK WHORE GALORE: 100% – SWEET"

100% SWEET. - Bitter Lemons


"Comedy “Crack Whore Galore – Live!”: Now-March 12 @ Atwater Village Theatre"

“Crack Whore Galore – Live!” is a spunky rock show featuring two edgy ex-rehabbers ready to blast through the doors showing no mercy for their audience. Danny and Abbey Galore have come to the States all the way from the U.K. to give viewers a variety of dirty love and rock ’n’ roll on stage. With snarky British accents and attitudes like Sid and Nancy, the music duo performs catchy numbers with graphic lyrics.

Rock ’n’ roll, however, isn’t all about the talent on stage but the raw love you have for it. With not a single lesson taken between the pair, Danny on guitar and Abbey on drums provide much hilarity in their performance, looks and songs, demonstrating a rock ’n’ roll show that would make Johnny Rotten jealous. From the lovely imaginations of Danny Roew, Tonya Cornelisse, Ryan Oliver, Gates McFadden and Graham Sibley, this play brings tons of late-night, adult humor and pure love of rock music. Clever and witty, the show is outrageous, refreshing and not to be missed by anyone who loves music. - Campus Circle


"Crack Whore Galore - Live!"

A conventional coffeehouse music session goes to hell when Abbey and Danny Galore come storming into the Ensemble Studio Theatre/LA, an intimate cabaret space at the new Atwater Village Theatre Complex.

Abbey and Danny’s band Crack Whore Galore makes its world premiere in this delightfully fringy late-night show.

Abbey and Danny Galore are the quirky creations of Tonya Cornelisse, Ryan Oliver, Danny Roew, Graham Sibley, and Gates McFadden, who also directed the play. With cockney accents and an insatiable craving for sex and celebrity, Abbey and Danny formed their band after meeting in rehab in the UK; they have since replaced drugs with dreams of a sexy rock ’n’ roll career in Hollywood.

It takes talent to craft such deliciously amateur performers as Danny and Abbey, who wheel their props onto the stage in a bright blue shopping cart. A dismembered silver mannequin and a spray-painted bedsheet tacked to the wall announce Crack Whore Galore’s glorious arrival.

Bedecked in oversized sunglasses and tight rock ’n’ roll attire, the Galores intersperse sexually-explicit songs with bizarre life stories. They keep up a lively banter with the audience, passing around an empty mayonnaise tub to collect money for their old rehab center in the UK. (Audiences beware: who knows what all that mayo has been used for!) They even show clips and provide hysterical live sound effects for their unicorn sex tape, now available on DVD.

Abbey and Danny’s relationship might be described as hardcore sentimental: simultaneously sexual and sappy, which particularly comes across in their songs. With lead singer Danny on electric guitar and Abbey on drums, the band’s effusive numbers are high points of the act. Down and dirty lyrics to songs such as "Bangers and Mash" send the audience into laughing fits. Lyrics are sometimes obscured by Abbey’s panache on drums - but the Galores are such heightened and compelling characters that a few missed words don’t detract much from the performance.

While the lanky Danny strums and sings, Abbey pounds away with deadpan fervor. She counts off the music in awkward 3’s and 6’s instead of the necessary 4 beats, and she smacks the cymbals with her body at stiff right angles. This is a deep-voiced woman in control and unashamed to articulate her own desires.

If you seek a quality musical performance, Danny and Abbey Galore will gloriously disappoint. But if you’re seeking a little raunchy humor with over-the-top characters primed to become the next YouTube sensation, Crack Whore Galore - Live! may just be your late-night cuppa tea. - Edge - Los Angeles


"Neil LaBute's The Break of Noon and Crack Whore Galore — Live!"

Ensemble Studio Theater – Los Angeles is staging an obscenely funny late-night rock-music sketch show, Crack Whore Galore — Live!, at its new Atwater Village theater. Created by Ryan Oliver, Danny Roew, Graham Sibley, Tonya Cornelisse and director Gates McFadden, it features Sibley and Cornelisse as Brit-trash rockers who met in a London rehab and somehow made it to Hollywood, or at least to its sidewalks, in pursuit of rock & roll stardom. Their band is called Crack Whore, and their hour long cabaret opens with warm-up balladeer Jackie Tohn on acoustic guitar, crooning with remarkable vocal dexterity about low self-esteem and love. Into her act crash wafer-thin, obnoxiously loud Abbey (in shades, skirt and torn fishnets) and Danny Galore (in vest and ripped shirt), wielding a shopping cart filled with mannequins and other crap for their act.

Commenting loudly on how each of Tohn's songs is worse than the last, they "set up" behind her while she attempts to finish her act. They smash open a roll-down screen (to be used for a preview of their sex tape, sold after the show in the lobby). The moment the livid Tohn leaves the stage captures the moment '60s folk yielded to punk.

What follows is pornography in song. In fact, during a 30-second "break," guitarist Danny impregnates drummer Abbey for at least the sixth time since they met. You'd think Abbey is beyond a meltdown, but in a moment of despondency, she crawls inside the shopping cart: "I can't do this anymore, Danny, I just can't."

To woo her back, and out, he croons the love song that he wrote just for her: "It's all clogged up/The pressure's all built up/I think I might explode/Now I need to blow my fucking load. ..."

She swoons in adoration, and they're back on track. The power of love, and of song.

They try to tell us their "story," or to sell us their story — which is the larger point — but can't agree on the details. She's told a wrong version so many times, he can't quite grasp what's real anymore. There, but for the grace of God ...

It's not a life-changing event, but the energy electrifies, the music is surprisingly good and the performances are top-tier. - LA Weekly


"'Crack Whore Galore' at Atwater Village Theatre"

Why are drug-addled British rock stars so endearing — at least as fictional characters? First the guys in Spinal Tap and now Danny and Abbey Galore in Ensemble Studio Theatre-L.A.’s late-night performance piece "Crack Whore Galore" at Atwater Village Theatre — win our hearts by violating our standards of decency. They have us at "... off."

In a space set up like a coffeehouse, a singer-songwriter (Kristy Hanson, a class act and a good sport) performs — only to be interrupted by the Galores, punk throwbacks in skintight leather pants (Danny, played by Graham Sibley) and fishnets (Abbey, played by Tonya Cornelisse), pushing a shopping cart full of props. They comment insultingly on Hanson’s songs in thick Cockney accents as they set up, forcing her to cede the stage.

“We’re the Galores! We used to be crack whores,” they bellow, Danny on guitar and Abbey on drums. Between this and their other lewd numbers (“Bangers and Mash”) they explain that they met in rehab, got clean, got married and moved to Hollywood to be rock stars. As such, they’re proudly marketing their sex tape. They planned to sell copies after the set, but Danny forgot to pick them up from Kinko’s.

Cornelisse’s sharp tongue and husky voice, Sibley’s dim sweetness and not-quite-there smile, and their uninhibited passion (they leave the stage mid-show to have sex) make the Galores adorable heirs to the “rockumentary” tradition. A Web series about them, “We Are the Galores,” has been produced, and there undoubtedly will be cachet to having seen them live before they went viral. - The Los Angeles Times


Discography

SINGLES

fuckton
regular basis
bangers n mash
we r the galorz
35.62
cunt
laundry day

CWG EP releesed (only live shows/not online relesse yet)

LP entitled "Living Abortion" is cuming soon.

Photos

Bio

DANNY GALORE - VOCALS/GUITAR

I waz born in leschesterstien englund on august 9 1980. Me reel name iz Daniel Pirate Galorshak. Me middle name waz pirate becuz me patrnts tol me dat I stole me parentz lives. I waz born in a car port an there waz hail. Me dad waz in a band called Fukspeare he knew John Paul Jones. I waz 9 wen I ran away fer tha firs time. I like goats and this
one cat Jacob. Mi fatha showd me mi firs sexy film. Me granny kaught him. I waz n rehab dats ware I met abbey, we gawt maryeed moved to Hollywood. I luv sexxx & rock N roll. I sleep naked.

ABBEY GALORE - VOCALS/DRUMS

Abbey Galore, formerly Abbey Bumbashire, was born to a white mum and black father. She doesn't believe in breakfast. Her mum did hair and her dad, whom she has never actually met, was a Shakespearean street performer. She didn't start speaking until the age of 8 and then proceeded never to stop. Abbey liked the color black a lot and used to dress in black face from a very young age. She thought it more theatrical and it also made her feel closer to her missing dad. Up until she met Danny Galore she wanted to be a mime. The best part of anything is it's gooey filling. Abbey Galore is in the midst of masterminding a proper Rock-n-Roll show on the moon. Abbey is very good at dancing. Fook off now.

DISCLAIMER

DANNY & ABBEY GALORE ARE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS PLAYED BY GRAHAM SIBLEY AND TONYA CORNELISSE.

Graham Sibley and Tonya Cornelisse have been writing, producing and staring in projects since being cast together in the independent horror flick “Zombie Honeymoon”. “Zombie Honeymoon” premiered at Slamdance and went on to win many awards including the Fangoria Chainsaw Award for Best With Less and has been deemed by MovieLine one of the "7 Masterpieces of the ’00s You’ve Likely Never Seen". "Zombie Honeymoon" constantly airs on Showtime, Universal HD and Chiller.

Since then the duo has focused on comedy and the first film in which they wrote, produced and star, “Dog Lovers”, premiered at the Sundance Film Festival and gathered quite a bit of attention in Park City. The short comedy explores two dog lovers who meet in a dog park and bond over each other’s dog’s genitalia. The Sundance experience opened many doors and helped kick off the duo’s next project – “Crack Whore Galore - LIVE” – a live rock n’ roll play, where Graham and Tonya play sex addicted (wannabee) rock n’ roll stars desperate for fame and fortune. “Crack Whore Galore – LIVE” received critical success, has sparked a TV pilot (Fallout Entertainment) and a fully produced album (drops end of 2011).

In the fall of 2010, the duo traveled abroad to Singapore to film the sci-fi action flick “Robotropolis” (Produced by Bleiberg Entertainment and Boku Films). Premiering at the end of 2011, Graham and Tonya play quirky camera operators covering the unveiling of a new facility that is completely maintained by robot prototypes. When one of the robots goes haywire, the news team find themselves not just reporting on the malfunction, but also fighting for their lives.

Graham and Tonya both live in Los Angeles and are not f*cking.