Danny Mendlow

Danny Mendlow

BandComedy

Other Info

Cover band: 
No

Lyrics

ODE TO YOUTH

Written By: Danny Mendlow

ODE TO YOUTH

You might as well admit it kid

the world you think you should be living in

Is not the world you're living in so...

wake up

take up, something else for your positioning

there aint nobody listening

ideals that you're believing in are...

made up

break up, with your relationship to anything

meaningful and relevant

your dreams are apparitions meant to...

shake up

stay tough, but wake up and realize that

You might as well admit it kid

the world you think you're living in

Is not the world you're living in so...

stay true

to you, but you'll have to learn to bury it,

at any time to benefit,

the world's not you, the rest of it is

fed up

let up

on the struggle to suggest it

could be better just accept it

we've been there and we kept it

this way

this day

is just another like tomorrow

work and eat and drown your sorrow

in a pint glass and then borrow

some cash... that you'll

pay back

once you've got an education

there's no need for demonstration

take your pay stub and then waste it on...

stability, fertility, a picket fence with millipedes

willingly, fulfillingly, take a number, fill in the

ballot

tally it

because now you're just a citizen

you might as well admit it kid

the world you think you're living in

is not the world your living in

Work until your pensions in

then sit back and remember when

things were so much simpler then

and wait,

for fate,

to come and take your breath away

if you're lucky maybe set away

something for a charity, and...

fade away

stay awake

your dreams have passed you by

and in your home for old and blind

as you're waiting there to die then...

Maybe then

At the end

you might feel just how you feel today

like every day and any day

is every way and any way but it's...

too late

your date

has expired, life is sour this

is true and you are powerless

time is relative and hourless

and the world keeps spinning on it's axis.

GEDOWN! (The Arnie Rap)

Written By: D-Lo and Professor Funk the Fifth

DANNY
Remember how I said I'd kill you last?/ I lied, now I'll bust a nine in your ass/ Gedown! Very fast or I'll make like Terminator and blast from the past/ I'll be back, I'm not black, but I rhyme like I lift weights, lots/ You like that puny man?/ It's just a rumor It's not a tumor/ Get a sense of humor or I'll kill you sooner/ Bitches Gedown and blow my thing/ I'll blow up sixteen cops and a building/

ABE
I'll be back, with the gat/ I pack heat, like rocket launchers/ I'll pump you up, like tires/ Think I retired? Terminator 3/ I'll kill you and tell someone you're dead tired/ Green Beret MC's, you better think fast/ 'cause Arnie eats green berets for breakfast Get Down!

BOTH
In Junior I had a baby/

SAMPLE
'scratch' cold gettin bigger.

BOTH
What? You callin' Arnie a lady?/

(girl sings rhythmicly)

Artificial Insemination,/ Hollerin Gedown across da Nation/
Gedown Gedown Na na na na.

ABE
Get Down or I'll snipe you/ Then run my pipes through your face./ It's okay I'll drive through a forest in a hummer,/ The steering wheel is a brace/

DANNY
I jump from a plane into a lake/ You hatin'? You think it was fake/ I'll kill you with my biceps and a rake./ Last action hero Went from hero to zero/ 'cause nobody came and watched my damn movie just because I didn't kill enough innocent people. What is this you pricks come to my fucking movies, Gedown!

BOTH
Arnold rocks the sound/ While bench pressing 800 pounds

Gedown Gedown Na Na Na Na

DANNY
I rip up mics like predators/ you don't like my grammar?
(gunshot)
Then I kill my editors/ I kill more people every fucking day/ than SARS does in a year, Okay!/ True lies, it's true a girl cries/ and with a thousand bullets, everybody dies./ Die Hard, I'll kick Bruce Willis in the nards/ spraying AK's and sending glass shards flying

Everybody Gedown

BANG BANG BANG

ABE
Cruisin' in my hum V, curling weight/ Got the top down, my license plate says Get Down!/ Blow the whole building/ kill every living thing./ Until I vacate the premises/ having laid waste to my nemesis./ In a creative fashion, I be mashin ho,/ using more than just a tongue lashin, to keep your head bashed in, ogh./ I bust a bazooka, crashin' your car./ You sayin' Arnolds getting old, only from far/ You say my rhymes are weak?/ these lies aren't true, the ones you speak/ You think I'm slowin' down, How do ya figure?/ My muscles gettin big, but my games gettin bigger, Get Down!

DANNY
Bling Bling I got phat stacks a cash/ phat blocks a hash/ I'll bash your face in/ quit wastin my time. Rhymes?/ I kick 'em like you... in the head./ Now you're dead, full of lead,/ go to bed early you little baby MC./ Maybe I'll see you alive, maybe not./ You just got shot Biotch./ Schwarzenegger, crash your kegger/ See your hoe on the street and I'll egg her,/ In the face, what a disgrace/

BOTH
Taste my bullets, also in the face/ throw you on the ground, stomp your face/ you know what's ugly, your face

Gedown!

ABE
This has been an Arnold Production
Gedown

(Girl sings rhythmically)

DANNY
Shut up!

(gunshot)

The Nerd Rap

Written By: D-Lo and Professor Funk the Fifth

DEXTER
Yo, wassup Poin?

POIN
Wassup Dexter?

DEXTER
Listen man, I been hearin’ a lot of unnecessary bullshit about Poindexter not being grammatically correct. Yo, why these haters gotta be bringin’ a lot of unnecessary bullshit to a couple of certified geniuses like you and me? I mean, these haters couldn’t spot an improperly utilized semi-colon if it up and bit them in the colon.

POIN
Ya, I hear ya, I hear ya. Man, like just the other day, this English professor’s all up in my biznass, talkin’ alot of noise about how two or more independant clauses can’t be linked by a semi-colon, and was like what? Mother-fucker.

DEXTER
Man, you try n tell that cat a semi-colon could be used in that situation just as adequately as a connection utilizing coordinating conjunctions.

POIN
Or punctuated by seperate sentences

DEXTER
Mother fucker lose his mind

POIN
Wouldn’t be hard. His cerebral cortex probably in equilibrium with his medulla. Moiii.

DEXTER
Moiiii. Yo, seriously Poin, you ready to do this.

POIN
Ya, I’m ready.

DEXTER
Yo, Poindexter, settin’ the standard for breakin’ it down, like carbon. You can keep havin’ our half-life but you can never completely destroy us you know what I’m sayin’? Energy cannot be destroyed, only transferred. Crank the decibles cause heeeere we go.

POIN
I gotta plaid shirt complete wit a pocket protector/ Trifocals and braces on my face is why I’m mistaken for Hannibal Lector./ So much metal takin’ up my facial sector/ that biotch strollin’ by you just checked her out/ I’m too busy figurin’ out/ the calculation for her rate of velocity/ you copy me?

DEXTER
In straight up hi-fi sound bro, incredible quality/ her speed’s due to thousand’s of pounds of gravity/ more than just probably/ my large cranium, such an anomaly

POIN
I grow geraniums indo ho/ so I, grab a core sample of uranium/ fire a proton beam and listen/ to the sound of nuclear fission/ a bitch in my mind, is a female canine/ cause that’s what my calculator slash dictionary defines it as/ I take everything scientifically/ a night of magic cards and star wars is terrifically/ complimented by, Risk, Chess, trivial persuit and an IQ test/ I score your score times four score and four more points bitch.

DEXTER
My score broke the calculator/ I be tellin’ all these hates/ who can only see me standing on the podium/ after blowin’ up the scrabble triple word score pandemonium

POIN
Rollin’ by future shop in my Ford Tempo/ I reach into my pockets and reveal the dough/ go throw down a G in upgrading gigabytes/ so I can, surf da net for fitty nights/ straight with no wait for downloading time/ downloading rhymes a mine on kazaa/ for Poindexter’s web page design haraa/ I be connected with T3 fiber-optics/ you’re still on phone line so step back while I rock this/ I got DSL on my cellular tell you dial up MC/ you’re homework unfished while I pile up three/ weeks advanced hand-ins and diminish/ your GPA, rollin’ to grad in a three-piece blazer/ sharp and accurated like my pen pointing lazer/ I got the authentic Star Trek phaser/ and I’m the first wedgie for the freshman hasers

DEXTER
I write editorial letters straight to the papers/ hand in essays, gold-plated folders, no wasteful/ staples, just straight paper clips/ cd’s of broadway hits line my walls/ I got closets full of blow-up dolls/ I have a ball when I call professors on their mistakes/ Until a brawl involving all of them makes steak of my face/ I crawl till I fall straight outta their sight/ get a pack of ice and some 12 sided dice for the party tonight./ Oiiii/ Pencils? Alright./ I got one behind the ear, five in the breast pocket/ and three in the rear pockets/ can’t stop it when I rock it like Nasa Scientists/ I wanna be a lawyer with lotsa clients bitch/ Poindexter, we’re here to vex ya/ we rhyme real rough like sandpaper texture. What?

Downtown (Eastside Remix)

Written By: Julie Webster, Danny Mendlow

When you’ve no home, no cash, no car and no phone

Then you can always go

Downtown, grab some

Flavourful condoms better make sure you got ‘em,

If you're gonna blow

Downtown

Passersby avert their eyes like you’re not even human

Close your eyes and open wide like your smoking a cuban

Take your money to…

That guy who sells the best stuff

You can forget all your troubles; ‘cause you’ve had enough when you’re

Downtown – you find the best rock when you’re

Downtown – you just gotta suck a cock

Downtown – herpes is waiting for you

Downtown... Downtown...

Don't hang around, the cops are tracking you down

They recognize you now

Downtown

Maybe you know some little places to go

Until the heat dies down

Downtown

They say some girls are out there who will do it for their children

The deadbeat dads don’t pay support, so he’s really the villain

She’s selling her soul

But for, the rest of us we

Don’t care about anything, except our next fix so we’re living

Downtown – getting clothes from the trash

Downtown – selling your ass for cash

Downtown – there’s no nobility here

Downtown...Downtown...Downtown...

Downtown!

Downtown!

When this song was written they tried to make it sound so pretty

What they failed to mention is that the real thing is shitty

Will someone save me too?

Just maybe I'll meet a guy

Who can forget I’m a hooker, look me in the eye but we’re

Downtown – Pretty woman was shit

Downtown – Like that would ever happen

Downtown – This aint no fantasy land.

3rd Downtown

5th Downtown