Double Space

Double Space

 New York City, New York, USA
BandRockJazz

Other Info

Cover band: 
No

Lyrics

Somethin' Isn't Kosher

Written By: Meira Marom

Twelve hours on a plane
Oy the pain,
The lengths I go to
And just so my boy will appreciate
Our traditions - but dear God - I’m way too late

Blood, sweat and warts,
Suffered in vain
And twenty four of my years gone down the drain
How could this be?
I think I’m fainting…
Where is my tea?!

Somethin’ isn’t kosher
Mmm…
Somethin’ isn’t kosher
Here…
Somethin’ isn’t kosher
Here….
My only baby’s got a shikse!

A shikse, a shikse, a shikse
The pain, in vain, the pain in vain!

Since he left I’m ill at ease
It’s no surprise
But little did I realize
How intent he was to hasten my demise

It’s best to accept
There goes
Everything I've built
I could have sworn that I got through to him
didn’t I instill in him sufficient guilt?

Somethin’ isn’t kosher
Mmm...
Somethin’ isn’t kosher
Here…

Living in sin
With a goya
With no intentions foreseen
To become a lawya’
I need a smoke -
I’m having a stroke!
I guess it's my fault…

Somethin’ isn’t kosher
Mmm...
Somethin’ isn’t kosher
Here…
Somethin’ isn’t kosher
Here….
My only baby’s got a shikse!

A shikse, a shikse, a shikse
The pain, in vain, the pain in vain!

After the Tsimess

Written By: (instrumental)

(instrumental)

My English is Bad

Written By: Gilad Cohen

My English is bad
My English is bad
I don’t know
What the difference between
Winner and wiener is.
When I enrolled in school
I tried to prove that I’m no fool
Showed off by sayin’ Tchaikovsky wrote
The "Peanuts Breaker" ballet

My English is bad
Oh, it’s pretty sad
I told my girlfriend that
she should live a little bit -
So she left…

I used to write my sweetie: "Dear sweaty"
And buy her bolognese spaghetti,
Took her to the library when she asked to “go steady”

I have no “R”
I just have no “R”!
I’m twing vewy hawd to pwonounce awww!
Oh go ahead and make fun!
But just twy to say “Mechurfan”!
And then you’ll see it’s not so easy eithew!

My accent is bad
It’s driving me mad
I’m trying, I’m trying, I’m trying to say:
Winner, dinner, Canada!
Chat, scat, banana!
And how about “Oh My Gosh!”
(He wants to sound like white trash!)
Say, like, “amazing”
“astounding”
“outstanding”
“outsourcing!”

And how about the most important
word in any conversation:
“Awesome!”
“It’s awesome!”

My spelling is poor
Ani Mamash Boor [I’m really ignorant]
But why the hell do you spell synagogue
Sy-na-go-gu-e?

I’m an alien
I’m a non-resident alien
I’m an Israeli in New York.

My accent is bad
It’s driving me mad
I’m trying, I’m trying, I’m trying to say:
Winner, dinner, Canada!
Chat, scat, banana!
(Just forget it!)
And how about “Oh My Gosh!”
(He wants to sound like white trash!)
Say, like, “amazing”
“astounding”
“outstanding”
“outsourcing!”

And how about the most important
word in any conversation:
“Awesome!”
“It’s awesome!”

There will come a day
When my English is OK
And my accent is my fowte

Why Wait

Written By: Meira Marom

WELL, I’VE BEEN HERE FORTY DAYS,
AND I’VE OBSERVED THE LOCALS’ WAYS
THEY’RE SO GENTEEL, MY HEART IS SIMPLY BREAKIN’
NO CHUTZPA MEANS ADVANTAGE IS TAKEN.
I’VE COME ALL THE WAY FROM OVERSEAS
TO OFFER YOU MY EXPERTISE,
I’M YOUR ISRAELIFYING SAVIOR
I’LL COACH YOU INTO SMARTER BEHAVIOR
WAITING IS AN EVIL VICE
LIFE IS TOO SHORT, YOU DON’T GET TO GO TWICE

OH, DID I JUST CUT IN LINE? OH, I BEG YOUR PARDON.
I'LL HAVE TO CATCH YOU LATER, I THINK WE'RE STARTIN’.

WHY WAIT WHEN YOU CAN NOT WAIT?
YOU'RE NOT GETTING ANY YOUNGER
IT COSTS THE SAME TO WAIT AND NOT WAIT
SPARE YOUR BOREDOM, STRESS AND HUNGER
WHY WAIT WHEN YOU CAN NOT WAIT?
YOU'RE NOT GETTING ANY YOUNGER

WHO LIKES KETCHUP? RAISE OF HANDS.
HOW MUCH DO YOU SPEND ON YOUR BRAND?
ABOUT 6 BUCKS A BOTTLE, I GUESS?
YOU COULD BE MUNCHING FOR SO MUCH LESS.
YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED, JUST LIKE ME,
FOOD CHAINS GIVE IT OUT FOR FREE

WHY PAY WHEN YOU CAN NOT PAY?
YOU'RE NOT GETTING ANY RICHER
IT COSTS YOU SO MUCH LESS TO NOT PAY
MONEY STRESS IS HELL – SO DITCH IT
WHY PAY WHEN YOU CAN NOT PAY?
YOU'RE NOT GETTING ANY RICHER

FREE YOUR MIND OF USELESS SHAME
FREE RELISH CALLING OUT YOUR NAME
LIFE COULD BE EASIER, GET MY DRIFT?
IF ONLY YOU ACCEPTED GIFTS

WHO WORKS TOO HARD? IF YOU DO, SAY I!
HAVE YOU EVER STOPPED TO CONSIDER WHY?
IT'S YOUR OWN MUSCLES THAT YOU'RE HURTTIN'
EFFORT CAN BE SUCH A BURDEN.
FORGET THE RULES AND FREE YOUR MIND
A PAYCHECK’S SWEETER WHEN THERE'S LESS WORK BEHIND
IT, TRUST ME, LIFE CAN BE SO MUCH MORE
PLEASANT, WHEN IT'S NOT A CHORE
COURTESY’S SO OVERDONE, IT'S A CRIME
MOVE ON, FRIENDS, LET’S ADMIT IT’S TIME

WHY WORK WHEN YOU CAN NOT WORK?
YOU'RE NOT GETTING LESS TIRED
IT STRAINS YOU SO MUCH LESS TO NOT WORK
DO IT WELL - YOU WON'T GET FIRED
WHY WORK WHEN YOU CAN NOT WORK?
YOU'RE NOT GETTING LESS TIRED

FREE YOUR MIND OF NEEDLESS GRACE
CLOCK IS TICKING, UP THE PACE
YOU'LL SAVE HOURS, LIKE A MILLION,
THIS IS REAL LIFE, NOT COTILLION

WHY WAIT WHEN YOU CAN NOT WAIT?
YOU’RE NOT GETTING ANY YOUNGER.
WAIT! BUT YOU COULD NOT WAIT
LIFE’S SHORT, HAVE A BIT OF FUN
DON’T PAY, WHEN YOU COULD NOT PAY
YOU’RE NOT GETTING ANY RICHER
HEY! BUT WHY NOT NOT PAY?
SAVE DOUGH, COSTS CAN BE A BITCH.
WHY WORK WHEN YOU CAN NOT WORK?
KICK BACK, JOBS ARE SUCH A PAIN
JUST SMIRK ‘CAUSE YOU CAN NOR WORK
YOU’LL SEE JUST HOW MUCH YOU’LL GAIN
WHY WAIT WHEN YOU CAN NOT WAIT?
YOU’RE NOT GETTING ANY YOUNGER.
WAIT! BUT YOU COULD NOT WAIT
LIFE’S SHORT, HAVE A BIT OF FUN