JOKEYOKE

JOKEYOKE

 Burbank, California, USA
BandComedyWorld

It’s like karaoke... But with jokes! This is your chance to hop on stage and be a comedian. Never thought you were funny enough before? Don’t worry! We’ve got you covered! This is your chance to show off your comedy chops and/or convince your friends to do it!

Biography

HOW DOES IT WORK?

Just sit back, listen and Laugh! We take care of everything! Every show comes complete with a professional Comedian/Emcee and all the equipment needed for the show. The Comedian/Emcee will perform about 15 Minutes of Stand Up Comedy at the Beginning of the show to warm-up the crowd, during that time the audience has been browsing through our Public Domain Joke Books and picking out their favorite jokes from categories such as Blonde Jokes, Dumb Law Jokes, Lawyer Jokes etc. Potential Audience members/participants sign up on a list; pick a joke number from our books or just choose grab bag and we'll pick a joke for you! Then it’s time for the funny-funny! Our hilarious Emcee calls up participants in the order of the sign in sheet and watch them go- The audience/participants are performing comedy right before your very eyes. They are reading and perform their favorite jokes right from our teleprompter live onstage! Each participant will perform approximately 1-2 minutes of comedy. After everyone has performed the Emcee will conduct an audience “winner by applause” vote and participants will win cash and prizes!

ADDITIONAL BENEFITS:

So now you’ve just had the comedy set of your life- And I bet you’ll want a copy to show all your friends! Well we take care of that too! We ask all our performers to sign a video release and every performance is videotaped. We offer copies of your show for only $25.00. Audience members can take home a performance of their show on DVD or for those World Travelers who don’t want to add any more baggae to their trip- they can simply download a copy of it securely from our FTP site- it’s easy we’ll show you how. Videos are available within 24 hours of the show!

Lyrics

Laywer Jokes

Written By: Public Domain

TOPIC: LAWYER JOKES –
You're a lawyer if
You Might Be A Lawyer If....
You are charging someone for reading these jokes.
The shortest sentence you have ever written was more than eighty words long.
You have a daughter named Sue and a son named Bill.
Your other car is a BMW.
When you look in a mirror, you see a lawyer.
When your wife says "I love you," you cross-examine her.

Advice from lawyers
George and Lenny decide to cross North America in a hot air balloon. However, neither were particularly experienced balloonists, and Lenny's mind quickly drifted from navigation to thoughts of how clouds look like cuddly little bunny rabbits. Upon realizing that they were lost, George declared, "Lenny -- we are going to have to lose some altitude so we can figure out where we are."

George lets some hot air out of the balloon, which slowly descended below the clouds, but he still couldn't tell where they were. Far below, they could see a man on the ground. George lowered the balloon, to ask the man their location.

When they were low enough, George called down to the man, "Hey, can you tell us where we are?" The man on the ground yelledback, "You're in a balloon, about 100 feet up in the air."

George Called down to the man, "You must be a lawyer." "Gee, George," Lenny replied, "How can you tell?" George answered, "Because the advice he gave us is 100% accurate, and is completely useless".

The man called back up to the balloon, "You must be a client." George yelled back, "Why do you say that?" "Well," the man replied, "you don't know where you are, or where you are going. You got into your predicament through a lack of planning, and could have avoided it by asking for help before you acted. You expect me to provide an instant remedy. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow my fault."

Marriage Jokes

Written By: Public Domain

TOPIC: MARRIAGE JOKES –
Marriage quotes 01
Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence.

Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached.

Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind.

Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her Masters.

Marriage is a thing which puts a ring on a woman's finger and two under the man's eyes.

Marriage certificate is just another word for a work permit.

Marriage is not just a having a wife, but also worries inherited forever.

Marriage requires a man to prepare 4 types of "rings":
* The Engagement Ring
* The Wedding Ring
* The Suffe-Ring
* The Endu-Ring

Light Bulb Jokes

Written By: Public Domain

TOPIC: LIGHT BULB JOKES

Lightbulb joke collection 03
Q: How many Jo Brands does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None, you give it to a bloody man to do, cos it's a piece of cake, isn't it? Well, no, actually, that expression is crap isn't it, because if you had a piece of cake, you'd bloody well eat it, wouldn't you?

Q: How many DIY buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Only one, but it takes him two weekends and three trips to the hardware store.

Q: How many recovering addicts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One, but it takes twelve steps.

Q: How many recovering addicts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One, as long as he admits he's powerless over light bulbs.

Q: How many recovering addicts does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One to screw it in and one to sponsor him.

Q: How many Soviet emigres does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Four. One to stand on a chair and hold the bulb, two to lift the chair by its legs, one to call an American and to ask which way to turn the chair.

Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a Soviet emigre?
A: One, if you aim well.

Discography

All the jokes are Public Domain and are listed in our joke books by categories and Number:
Such as Dumb Law Joke, Blonde Jokes, Marriage Jokes, Etc...

SAMPLE JOKE:
TOPIC: LAWYER JOKES –
You're a lawyer if
You Might Be A Lawyer If....
You are charging someone for reading these jokes.
The shortest sentence you have ever written was more than eighty words long.
You have a daughter named Sue and a son named Bill.
Your other car is a BMW.
When you look in a mirror, you see a lawyer.
When your wife says "I love you," you cross-examine her.

Advice from lawyers
George and Lenny decide to cross North America in a hot air balloon. However, neither were particularly experienced balloonists, and Lenny's mind quickly drifted from navigation to thoughts of how clouds look like cuddly little bunny rabbits. Upon realizing that they were lost, George declared, "Lenny -- we are going to have to lose some altitude so we can figure out where we are."

George lets some hot air out of the balloon, which slowly descended below the clouds, but he still couldn't tell where they were. Far below, they could see a man on the ground. George lowered the balloon, to ask the man their location.

When they were low enough, George called down to the man, "Hey, can you tell us where we are?" The man on the ground yelledback, "You're in a balloon, about 100 feet up in the air."

George Called down to the man, "You must be a lawyer." "Gee, George," Lenny replied, "How can you tell?" George answered, "Because the advice he gave us is 100% accurate, and is completely useless".

The man called back up to the balloon, "You must be a client." George yelled back, "Why do you say that?" "Well," the man replied, "you don't know where you are, or where you are going. You got into your predicament through a lack of planning, and could have avoided it by asking for help before you acted. You expect me to provide an instant remedy. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow my fault."

Set List

60 to 90 Minute Show- Based on your Needs!
Emcee- 15-20 Minutes of Stand Up Comedy
Audience participants- Each perform 1-2 Minutes of Comedy from our teleprompter (About 20-30 can get up based on time)
Emcee- Conducts Audience Popular Vote- for Favorite Comedians
PRIZE GIVEAWAY/Additional Show announcements