Liz Miele
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Liz Miele

New York City, New York, United States

New York City, New York, United States
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The best kept secret in music

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"ON THE BARK"


The life and hard times of the standup hopeful.
BY ADRIAN NICOLE LEBLANC
Late one Saturday night in January, at Ha! Comedy Club, on West Forty-sixth Street, Peyton Clarkson learned what it was to bomb. Peyton, a blond, blue-eyed twenty-three-year-old from Alabama, had been performing at Ha! for only a month and a half, but he'd had so many "spots" onstage-about twenty five-minute performances a week-that he'd already gained more experience than many young comics get in a year. Still, there's no substitute for public humiliation.

Peyton is soft-spoken in person but energetic and swingy when he's onstage. Like a lot of aspiring comics, he'd always been the class clown; at Auburn University, he was considered the funniest guy in his fraternity. After graduation, Peyton went to New York to become an actor. During the day, he waited on tables at a restaurant in Trump Tower and went on casting calls. Every night, on the way home from his second job-running the discount-ticket lottery for "Rent"-he would pass Ha!

The comedy world is a small one, and Ha! has a reputation as a home for starting comics, most of whom find their way there by word of mouth. Ha! also hosts an open-mike night once a week, during which hopefuls can audition for the club. The first time Peyton went, he got such a bad attack of stomach cramps that he left before his turn and ran the two blocks home, to Forty-seventh Street; the second time, he made it through his set and was told that he was good enough to bark-to distribute flyers to passersby and get them to come to the club. In return for getting two people to a show, Peyton would have a five-minute set.

Ha! has two stages. The main one, on the ground floor, is larger and is considered tougher, because the audience members feel more anonymous; the farther away people are from the comic, the more comfortable they are shouting out or creating their own private parties. In the lounge upstairs, Peyton had never lost the audience. The room is more intimate, with high barstool tables lining two of the walls, and lower tables surrounding a tiny stage. On this January night, though, the proximity worked against him. Even his boyish comedic style-a naive pose with lots of gesturing and miming-failed to elicit the protective feeling he often gets from an audience.

"This motherfucker ain't gonna be funny," a woman said before Peyton even reached the stage.

"My name is Peyton Clarkson," he began.

"This motherfucker's stupid," the woman said loudly. Peyton glanced at her boyfriend, hoping that he might shut her up, but he didn't say anything.

"My friends call me Consti-peyton," he continued, with less than his usual intended dopiness. The woman shook her head, disgusted. He went into the first full joke: "Everybody in my family is a really, really big drinker, or really, really homosexual. I personally prefer the drink over the pink, but you can bet I know how to make one hell of a Cosmo." It didn't get a laugh. Usually, the silence was only a pause, broken by laughter when he went into the character-narrowing his eyes and pursing his lips as he limply held a Martini glass. But this time the silence grew. And then Peyton made a serious mistake.

If you are going to address a heckler, you have to be sure that the audience is on your side-that it wants the heckler to be put down. And you have to be ready to say something funny that will end the exchange on your terms. Peyton appealed to the woman's mercy. "What have I done to you?" he asked. "Why are you so mad at me?"

"Stop it-just go to the next one," the woman said, her eyes down.

He tried, pulling his jokes from nowhere, out of order. "But what did I do?" Peyton asked the woman desperately, when it became clear that he'd lost the crowd. "Why are you so angry and bitter?"

"You just get on with your show," she said. "Don't worry about me-just go on with the show."

The m.c. flashes a red light when a comic has one minute left, and comics generally try to use up every second of the remaining time. That night, when the light was flashed, Peyton got offstage quickly, hot with shame. Despite a recent rule at the club that comedians can't drink during work, the club's manager, Francisco Aldorando, had a shot waiting for him at the bar. "I really screwed up," Peyton said later. "I was her bitch."

When Peyton emerged from the club to go home, around 2 a.m., a group of comedians were clustered beneath the club's red awning, smoking. It was an awkward moment: everyone knew that he had bombed. Just then, a Hummer limousine turned the corner at Forty-sixth Street and cruised down the empty block. "See that?" Francisco called out to Peyton, who was by then on the sidewalk.

Peyton turned back toward his colleagues, bracing himself: comics can be astonishingly cruel to one another.

"Someday, you're gonna be in there, with a bunch of strippers," Francisco said. "And I'll be driving."

Peyton looked grateful but baff - The New Yorker Magazine


Discography

- Performed on Comedy Central's show, Live at Gotham
- Youngest female comic to perform on Live at Gotham
- Profiled in the New Yorker @ 18
- Mentioned in the NY Times and NY Times magazine
- Winner of 2008 Gilda's Club Contest

For Bookings, and Current Calendar Updates please contact agent:
Rob Jockel
CUTTING EDGE ENTERTAINMENT
69 TRAILSEND DRIVE
CANTON, CT. 06019
860-693-9116 office
860-693-6866 fax
WEBSITE: http://cuttingedgeentertain.com/
EMAIL: rjockel@cuttingedgeentertain.com

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Bio

Liz Miele started doing stand-up at 16 and now at 23 she is a regular at some of the best clubs in New York City including, Carolines, Comic Strip Live, Gotham Comedy Club, and the Laugh Factory.
She has since appeared on Live at Gotham, on Comedy Central. She has also appeared on Late Night with Conan O'Brien, The Daily Show and theWE Network.

At 18, Liz was profiled in the April 2004 issue of The New Yorker. She was a finalist in the 2004 Ladies of Laughter contest, 2008 March Comedy madness contest and winner of 2008 Gilda's Club contest and her stand-up has been featured on AOL, XM radio, and Comedynet.com.

She has since appeared on Live at Gotham, on Comedy Central. She has also appeared on Late Night with Conan O'Brien, The Daily Show and the WE Network.

At 18, Liz was profiled in the April 2004 issue of The New Yorker. She was a finalist in the 2004 Ladies of Laughter contest, 2008 March Comedy madness contest and winner of 2008 Gilda's Club contest and her stand-up has been featured on AOL, XM radio, and Comedynet.com.

She has opened for Jim Gaffigan, Ted Alexandro, Alonzo Bodden, John Heffron, Jim Mendrinos, Louis Rameyand Aries Spears.