BandPopAdult Contemporary

Songwriter, singer, musician, screenwriter, music/recording teacher.... Loren has over 4 hours of songs recorded in a Pro Tools based studio. My best material is not on this site due to sonicbid's 5mb limit


Loren grew up along the West Coast of Michigan watching sunsets from the dunes. He descends from a line of upper middle class, liberal ministers. His story is simply to write better songs than anyone else and let the music do the talking. Loren appreciates all music, from all ages and countries, and the people who make it. He uses the various genres as needed, to create what audiences want to hear. This is basically what ministers do anyways.



Written By: Loren Dean

Hey, boys and girls! Wanna get off with some Raccooooons?

My neighbors are all Raccoons
Raccoons, Raccoons....
They wash their fur
with Vidal Sassoon
What a bunch of crazy Raccoons

They stay out all night long
trading gossip and contraband
Throw garbage all over my lawn
with their cute little hands

My neighbors are all Raccoons
Raccoons, Raccoons....
Eat their deserts
with little coke spoons
What a bunch of crazy Raccoons

Put on masks for Halloween
and never take them off
Throw the best parties
I’ve ever seen,
but enough is enough

Get tuff

Party at Loren's house

My neighbors are all Raccoons
Raccoons, Raccoons...
Shoot coke cans
by the light of the moon
What a bunch of crazy Raccoons

My home took a drop in price
cause of what they did
Race their Porsches
up and down the street
and they don’t stop for kids

My neighbors are all Raccoons
Raccoons, Raccoons...
Rocky left a note that said:
"be back soon"
What a bunch of crazy Raccoons

Grabbed a gun
and followed their trail
Tracked ’em high and low
Never found ‘em,
but I learned one thing
They sure play a mean banjo

Over here, Loren


Horse's Tale

Written By: Loren Dean


She bought me a braided,
horse’s tail,
from the grand ol’ state of Texas
She bought me a braided,
horse’s tail,
instead of the tricked out Lexus
I said: Thank you for the birthday
She said: "It’s the perfect gift for a horse’s ass”
She took off with my best friend,
but its nice without her bitchin’
She took off with my best friend.
Man, I sure do miss him.
He took her straight to a dog fight,
where we both bet she would win.

(And win she did …. Yep. A meat treat… Pass that over here. I am a finely oiled machine.)

The shrinkopath took her side,
but his theory was kinda lame
A shrinkopath took her side,
claimed I was the only one to
I said, Doc, its more like incest,
a game the whole family can play

Had a nasty divorce,
broke my little heart in two
Had a nasty divorce,
even the lawyers got confused
She got the bar,
and I got the stools
-- and the children got the booze!

(Now they‘re gonna turn out like her, lazy, fat, and buggy. She is the reason the kids are soooo ugly. Now here’s one for ya, mama.

I got your picture on
my dart board,
and another on my throne
I got your picture on
my dart board,
and another on my throne
And when I get tired
of poking your eyes,
I pinch a loaf right by your nose
The divorce went on forever,
then our lawyers took their bows
And still it wasn‘t over,
but I cannot tell you how.
I should’ve shot her
when I met her;
I’d be outa prison by now.

(Hey! it’s a hard dog to keep on the porch.
So what. Just hang on, …I ‘m writing the old lady a letter. )

There’s a lotta wisdom hidden,
in this rhythm and this rhyme
A whole world of experience,
for the penetrating mind.
But talking to a paranoid,
is just a perfect waste of time.

Man, I wish I had some money,
but the lawyers got me screwed
Yeah, I wish I had some money,
Lord, I know just what I’d do
I’d buy a big ship and sink it, baby,
but first I’d name it after you

Call it: Bye-bye chickipoo.
It’s over!

F*Beep You

Written By: Loren Dean


I'll give you two good reasons
to get off my back,
Before you start a fight.
First, I got a right to my opinion, Second, my opinion is right.
You got real problems, Mister,
for which I am not to blame.
You can respect me.
You can detest me.
Yet I remain the same.

Don’t like my music
Don’t like my face
Don’t like my hobbies
Don’t like my race
Don’t like my gestures
or my tattoos
All can say is: F*beep you

Hey brain cell, feeling punchy? Can’t keep your paws off her?
Better visit 5 finger Mary,
or I’ll be dropping
your temperature.
You say she’s yours,
but I say she’s mine.
Let’s step outside and see.
Now you can respect her,
or you can ignore her,
but she remains with me.

Don’t like my speeches,
Don’t like my clothes.
Don’t like my teeth,
Don’t like my nose
The more you mock me,
the more I choose,
to look you in the eye and say: F*beep you

Occifer Obie! How do you do? What brings you by?
Say I really like your flashlight.
Can you please take it out
of my eyes?
I’m just teaching this guy a lesson, So you won’t have to, sir.
You can respect me,
you can arrest me….
I guess, I’m out of here.

Don’t like our parties,
Don’t like our drugs.
Don’t like our hogs,
Don’t like our hugs.
Don’t like our justice, or attitudes. All I can say is f-beep you.


Finally getting some recordings worthy of review now. Warning: My MP3 tracks on this site are not balanced like from Pro Tools. Some instruments are too soft; others too loud. This is very annoying and is going to take some time to fix.

Set List

Loren is crashing out in his studio now. When the current backlog of songs are fixed, he may perform again. He is also looking into ways of gigging alone backed up by samples. He is also interested in finding others to perform his material.