Gig Seeker Pro



Band Rock Alternative


This band has not uploaded any videos
This band has not uploaded any videos



"Walk the plank- Jan. 8. 2009"

Indeed! To our delight and pleasure, last night the band attended the Machetes first EP release of “To Dirty To Be A Rat”. The packed Drake Underground was eager for more Machetes, as most crowd members stuck around for their second set of the night, just as jam packed as the first. The girls pumped the room full of shining sonic waves and vicious dog bite growls. Streaming with heart pounding bass and drums, ravenous guitar work, and to everyone’s delight, the amazing sound allowed Jen Simpson’s incredible vocals and lyrics to be heard. I picked out “Walk the plank” in one of their many new tracks premiered last night. Both their live show and songwriting is ever evolving. Not to mention their hand made EP, complete with red lipstick kisses. Oh yeah, and the recordings are great too. -

"Worthy sounds you may have missed in '08"

"Too Dirty To Be A Rat"

Machetes are go, Machetes are on top, Machetes are four feisty T.Dot femmes who stumbled on a stash of Seventies rock grrlz shit and set about mainlining Runaways and Siouxie Sioux joints. In one short year, they’ve put in the time playing the scuzzy joints for the down’n’dirty experience and emerged with sense of humour and enthusiasm intact. It’s all on the fierce stomp outs of debut EP, Too Dirty To Be A Rat, with Signal To Noise’s Rob Sanzo producing , a nice touch as he knows his way around a heavy sound without going all macho.

The song writing's none too shabby either, with lotsa payoff and future promise in “Ace” and the Bowiesque and picturesque “Schizo(The Young Undone)”
~~ -

"Machetes at the Silver Dollar"

"The Machetes kidnaps you with an earth-shattering, raucous post-punk work-out infusing elements of glam and early 90's riot-grrrl. Jen is a supercharged combination of Kathleen Hanna and Siouxsie Sioux, as the band unleashes high-speed breakneck fury, reminiscent of the punk-spirit and dive-bomb energy of late 70's CBGBs. Full of sass and no-bullshit bravado--these ladies will remind you that the sleaze, danger, and flash, is not dead." -

"NXNE'08: Moja, Machetes, and Hell Yeah Fuck Yeah"

"I headed to the Bovine Sex Club, and am so glad that I went when I did, as Machetes had just stepped onto the stage. Machetes are an all female foursome from here in Toronto that features blazing guitars and bass, and punked-glam outfits to match. Having only formed back in April of this year, their stage presence was that of a band with years under their belts, not just months." -

"The Woodhands Rock the Wrong Bar"

"I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the opening act, Machetes, a 4 girl band that reminded me of something vaguely British, though I suppose that isn’t very descriptive. The girls looked like rockers, and rocked like a mother fucker. I can’t describe how disappointed I was to learn they didn’t have any music for sale. I’ll have to find out when they’re playing live next. Seriously, I was really disappointed they didn’t have a CD. Also, the lead guitarist had purple pants on which looked hype." -


"Too Dirty to be a Rat" E.P Release date: Jan.7.2009

"Machetes at NXNE '08" DVD released: Dec. '08.

Up Coming:
"Machetes Cabaret" the Motion Picture DVD
Release date: Feb. '09



Introducing Machetes:
"Rock and roll drenched by the scathing tongue of punk and post-punk passion.”

Machetes formed as if by fate, fueled by the common craving for excitement and creativity. A whirlwind of coincidences drew each member together, dragging them from their respective spaces in the wide music landscape of Toronto. The beginnings proved to be quite proliferating, as the girls’ unique and diverse musical backgrounds clashed and converged, creating a mosaic of sound and imagery that injects passion and drive back into the limp, sterile body of rock and roll.

The integrity and glamour of Machetes comes out in both the music and their show- it’s the love child conceived by a massive orgy of music that includes Siouxsie Sioux, Love and Rockets, Iggy Pop and Black Sabbath- and that’s just for starters. Influences range from art-rock to brit-pop, punk/post-punk to glam, each member contributing equally to the overall look and sound. Playing weekly to overcrowded underground clubs and attracting a diverse crowd of dedicated followers, their shows are a delicate blend of mayhem, beauty and aggression driven by powerfully delivered songs.

To date, Machetes have shared bills with Woodhands (sold out, debut show at the Wrongbar, Toronto), Born Ruffians, dd/mm/yyyy and Semi-Precious Weapons, while releasing their first E.P, Too Dirty to be a Rat, on Jan. 7. 2009, produced and recorded by Rob Sanzo (Signal-to-Noise Studios, Lioness, Controller.Controller and more...).

Machetes are managed by Roger O'Donnell (the Cure, & more...) -- Ten 55 Artist Management ---