Makarioi

I'D LIKE TO START BY SAYING, PLEASE DON'T PREJUDGE ME BEFORE YOU HEAR MY STORY. I WAS THE PERSON THAT YOUR MOTHER TOLD YOU NOT TO DATE, NOT TO HANG OUT WITH, NOT TO PATTERN YOUSELF BEHIND. I SOLD YOUR MOTHER, FATHER SISTER AND BROTHERS CRACK COCAINE. I INDUCTED YOUR CHILDREN INTO GANGS. I WAS THE ABUSIVE BOYFRIEND THAT YOU HEARD ABOUT ON TV. I SHOT MEN, AND HAVE BEEN SHOT BY MEN. I HATED ANYBODY THAT DID'NT SUBMIT TOO MY AUTHORITY OR BOW DOWN TO MY WILL. I HUNG OUT WITH KILLERS, DRUG DEALERS, GANGBANGERS, PIMPS, HUSTLERS AND THEIVES, AND EVENTUALLY BECAME A LITTLE OR A LOT OF EACH. EVEN THEN I WAS'NT A TALKER, I WAS A DO'ER. THE STRANGE THING ABOUT ALL THIS IS THAT I WORKED AT MY FATHERS FUNERAL HOME BY DAY, AND TERRORIZED THE STREETS BY NIGHT. MY EYES HAVE SEEN THE AFTER MATH OF MURDER, BUT I'VE ALSO SEEN MEN BEING MURDERED (DEVASTATING). SO YOU ASK ME WHY DO I TELL YOU ALL OF THIS. NOT TO BRAG, BUT TO TELL YOU THAT I'M TRUELY SORRY. YOU SEE I WAS BLINED BY SATANS STRONG HOLD ON ME WITH DRUGS AND ALCOHOL AND THE LUST FOR POWER. I REALIZE NOW THAT THE LORD HAD TO ALLOW SATAN TO TAKE ME THROUGH ALL OF THAT SO I COULD BE IN THE PLACE I AM NOW. YOU ASK, WHERE ARE YOU NOW. TO TELL YOU HONESTLY, I'M AT PEACE WITH THE LORD. YOU SEE, TWO YEARS AGO I WAS IN THE CLUB WITH MY BEST FRIEND, WE WHERE WELL KNOWN IN THE COMMUNITY FOR LOTS OF THINGS, BUT ON THIS PARTICULAR NIGHT WE GOT INTO A ALTERCATION WITH SOME OTHER GUYS. TO MAKE A LONG STORY SHORT, I SAW ONE OF THE GUYS RUNNING OUT OF THE CLUB, I TRIED TO STOP HIM, I WARNED MY FRIENDS THAT I THOUGHT HE WAS GOING TO GET A GUN BUT I HAD MY BACK TO THE DOOR AS I WAS TALKING TOO THEM HE CAME BACK IN AND HE SHOT, BUT AT THAT TIME I FELT A HAND PUSH ME OUT OF THE WAY, BUT THE STRANGE THING IS THAT THERE WAS NO ONE STANDING BY ME. WHEN I HEARD THE SHOT I THOUGHT I WAS HIT, BUT I FOUND OUT THAT THE SHOT HAD HIT AND KILLED MY BEST FRIEND. AT THIS TIME THE POLICE WANTED TO QUESTION ME ABOUT THE MURDER. BUT I DID'NT KNOW MUCH. AT THIS TIME THE DETECTIVE HAD RAN MY FINGERPRINTS AND FOUND OUT THAT I WAS WANTED ON ESCAPE FROM ANOTHER STATE, AND HAD A FELONY WARRANT IN ANOTHER COUNTY. I HAD BEEN ON THE RUN FOR FIVE YEARS AND NOW MY PAST WAS ABOUT TO CATCH UP TO ME. BUT WHILE I WAS IN JAIL THE LORD SPOKE TO ME BUT I HAD NEVER HEARD THE LORD BEFORE SO I THOUGHT I WAS GOING CRAZY SO I IGNORED HIM. INSTEAD I WAS PLOTTING ON HOW TO MURDER MY FRIENDS KILLER FROM THE PENETENTIARY, I WAS'NT LISTENING. SO A FEW WEEKS LATER I HEARD THE VOICE AGAIN, BUT THIS TIME IT WAS UNDENIABLE AND FORCEFUL. NOW I'M LISTENING, BUT I'M ANGRY AT GOD, BECAUSE I BLAMED HIM FOR MY FRIENDS DEATH AND FOR THE REASON I WAS IN JAIL. SO I RESPONDED, WHAAAT!!!!!!!! SO THE LORD ASKED ME PLAIN AND SIMPLE ( HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN ANY TROUBLE SOBER ) HUHH. (HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN TROUBLE SOBER ) SO I HAD TO THINK, MY ANSWER WAS, NOT THAT I CAN REMEMBER. NOW THE LORD DIRECTED ME TO MY BIBLE THAT WAS GIVEN TOO ME THE DAY BEFORE. HE TOLD ME TO GO TOO PROVERBS 23VERSE - 29 THRU 35. THEN HE SAID ( SEE YOU WORSHIP DRUGS AND ALCOHOL AND YOU HAVE NOT SEEKED ME SINCE YOU WERE A YOUNG CHILD, AND I ONLY GOT YOU HERE TO GET YOUR ATTENTION !) AT THAT TIME I CRIED AND TOLD GOD I WAS SORRY AND ASKED HIM TO FORGIVE ME. ( I HAD NOT BEEN SOBER IN A LONG TIME, BUT I WAS AT THIS TIME AND I COULD HEAR GOD CLEARLY). SO I ASKED GOD WHAT DID HE WANT FROM ME. HE REPLIED ( YOU HAVE DONE YOUR MUSIC FOR EVERONE BUT ME, USE THE TALENT THAT I GAVE YOU AND GO BRING MY LOST SHEEP BACK TO MY FLOCK). I TOLD GOD THAT I DON'T KNOW THAT MUCH ABOUT YOU AND I CAN'T TALK ABOUT YOU THAT MUCH NOT KNOWING YOU. HE SAID ( TELL THEM WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN THROUGH AND HOW YOU WERE LOST AND HOW I BROUGHT YOU BACK INTO MY FLOCK.BECAUSE I AM THE LORD THY GOD AND I CAN TAKE EVEN THE WORST OF THE WORST AND CHANGE THEM. I TOLD HIM THAT IF HE GOT ME OUT OF BOTH OF THESE SITUATIONS ( 10 YEARS PRISON TIME) I WOULD QUITE DRINKING AND DO WHAT HE WANTED. AT THIS TIME I JUMPED OFF MY BUNK AND TOLD THE LORD TO WAIT, I HAD TO USE THE BATHROOM. AT THIS TIME A GUY THAT I HAD BEFRIENDED WHILE I WAS IN THERE TOLD ME TO COME OVER AND GET MY CUP, AND WHEN I LOOKED HE HAD SOMETHING THAT I HAD NEVER SEEN BEFORE IN JAIL AND BELIEVE ME I'VE BEEN PLENTY OF TIMES. HE HAD A WHOLE FIFTH OF CROWN ROYAL (MY FAVORITE ) AND I TOLD HIM THAT I HAD JUST TOLD GOD THAT I QUIT DRINKING AND HE CURSED ME AND STARTED SAYING THINGS THAT I COULD'NT QUITE UNDERSTAND. AT THIS TIME I KNEW I WAS FACING SATAN AND HE WAS ANGRY AT ME BECAUSE I HAD BEEN SUCH A GOOD AND FAITHFUL SERVANT TOO HIM AND HE WAS ABOUT LOSE HIS CONTROL ON ME. SO I TOLD SATAN TOO GET BEHIND ME AND HE CURSED ME AND TURNED AND LEFT. WHEN I GOT BACK TO MY BUNK I WAS SHAKEN LIKE NEVER BEFORE. I ASKED THE LORD WHAT THAT WAS ALL ABOUT, HE REPLIED ( I AM THE LORD THY GOD, I DON'T HAVE TO RELEASE YOU TO TEST YOU ) TWO MONTHS LATER I WAS RELEASED. SO HERE I AM, A SOLDIER FOR CHRIST. STANDING ON THE FRONT LINE FOR OUR CHILDREN. ALL I NEED FOR YOU TO DO IS TELL E