Rena Jae

Rena Jae



-Rena Jae-
"Waiting For The Fall"
(Autobiography in Four Short Chapters)

Chapter 1- "This Ride Is Not For Those With Heart Conditions"
My life has always been a roller coaster. It’s like a seven-story high, three mile long contraption of force and velocity with two and only two objectives: develop my prayer life and shake loose change out of my pockets. There was always one person in line ahead of me who’d say "I’ve been on this one seven times and it only gets better." But I could never share their optimism.

You see, I lived the earliest years of my life in uncertainty of what each day would bring. My mom was serving a sentence for the ultimate crime: loving the wrong man. Waiting for my drunken stepfather to sober up felt like the eternity it takes for the coaster to reach the summit. And then you just hang there for a moment, dreading the sinking feeling in your stomach when you fall.

Chapter 2- "Taking The First Turn At Full Speed"
After the fall, fear grips you and you grip the closest thing to you. I was usually too afraid to open my eyes and the pressure on my chest made it too hard to even scream. But this was always the moment when things would level off and I found myself coasting at full speed. God is always on time with reprieve.

My mother eventually had the strength to leave and take me with her to make a fresh start. It was the first time in my life I felt free to appreciate the sun on my face, the wind in my hair and life whizzing by at 100 mph. I started to hear songs, a lyrical soundtrack of life.

Chapter 3- "The Loop To Loop"
Well, it isn’t really a roller coaster without a few loop to loops. For reasons I couldn’t understand, this always seemed to be the favorite part of the ride for the optimist in line ahead of me. I could do just fine without them however.

Unfortunately, my newfound freedom proved to be short lived. My mother became ill after a period of time and we were separated so we could both be cared for. I was now surrounded by strangers called family that were there to groom me into adulthood. I still heard songs, but they were very different now. My odes of liberation turned to ballads of determination. I was determined to escape, determined to heal and determined to live. In spite of my circumstances, I knew the loop to loop would pass and I would be coasting again if I hung in there.

Chapter 4 – "Coasting To The End"
I escaped insecurity by singing, playing music and writing songs. It was my way of releasing my inner being without the constraints of rules. I could be anyone I wanted at that moment. Music assured me that no matter how hard the coaster threw me around, I would certainly get back on.

Now when the coaster reaches the summit I don’t close my eyes. I throw my hands up and scream. No, I don’t scream for fear of the fall, but rather I scream in anticipation of the songs that are sure to follow. I’m now the optimist in the front of the line.

"Put the CD in, secure all loose articles and keep your hands inside the car at all times…"

-Rena Jae



Written By: S. Jackson, M. Thomas

Verse 1
I see you every day and I try to avoid your gaze
It’s not right to feel this way, won’t let you get to me
You go out of your way to get my attention
I go out of my way to look in another direction

We’re on two open roads with separate destinations
You wouldn’t understand, I have no time for explanations

I need to be alone
Don’t wanna feel the hurt and pain I felt once before
You can’t make me fall for love
I’ve closed those doors, I need to be alone

Verse 2
You find it hard to understand my ways
Say you could give me the world if I would just let you love me
You call me selfish and say that I’m a fool
Only fools fall in love and I’m not falling for you

You know I tried love but it wasn’t on my side
I gave it all I had but it didn’t love me back


Written By: S. Jackson, M. Thomas

Verse 1
I sat at work and thought of you all day
No matter what I did I couldn’t seem to concentrate
Today you didn’t say good morning or goodbye
You got dressed, ate your breakfast, read the paper and then you left

I never thought we’d feel so far apart
What happened to us?
We used to be so close, now I don’t know who you are

Remember our love, remember my arms
Remember the way you caught me with your charm
Remember our happiness
How could you ever forget?
Remember our walks, remember our vows
Remember our talks, when we first made love
I’m breaking inside, this feeling ain’t right
Don’t wanna lose the love of my life

Verse 2
I tried to surprise you with a bed of roses
And your favorite champagne
It’s been four hours and you haven’t called me,
I tried your cell, I guess you’re working late again
Could you please talk to me, take a minute of your time
Let me know, don’t put me off, what’s going on
I can’t read your mind
But let’s do what we need to make it right

I don’t wanna separate now ‘cause I believe we can make it somehow
We’ve been through too much to end our love, baby believe in us
Remember, say you won’t give up
Understand you complete me, I need you
Together there ain’t nothing we can’t do


Written By: S. Jackson, M. Thomas

Have you ever been deep, really deep?
To a place where you’re totally free?

Verse 1
Let me take you where you’ve never been before
Experience feelings you’ve never explored
We can do whatever comes natural
Follow me right this way
Don’t be afraid, there’s a beauty in not knowing
Every day my love for you is growing
Come relax, let me rub your back
You can ease your mind when you unwind

Open up your heart your eyes
Open up to me your mind
You’ll find in time, love’s better when it’s shown
Don’t be afraid, are you ready for the unknown
Open up your heart your eyes
Open up to me your mind
You’ll find in time, love’s better when it’s shown
Come with me, let me take you to the unknown

Verse 2
Let me walk you through how it begins
You must let go of your worries or inhibitions
Just let it flow, it’s all for you
We can start out slow then speed up the tempo
Feel me now, I’m zoning out
You got me hooked like I knew you would
This is where you belong
No doubt in my mind, I knew it all along

Oh baby don’t stop, I’ll make you so hot
My lovin’ it rocks and you know it does
Can’t believe you’ve never been here before
I got you feelin’ me and wanting more


"Waiting For The Fall" LP - due Spring 2007

Set List

Enough original material for 45 minute set.

2 hours of covers from Toni Braxton, Anita Baker, Deborah Cox and others.