The Dingbat Follies

The Dingbat Follies


fake commercials for a real world. . . a celebration of misinformation. . .an unwinding of the clock of man's progress. . .a digression of the most fearful sort . . . Hi-jinx in Hi-Fi, about we leave it at that?


A cold wind blew that day. It was a day just like any other day (except for the cold wind that was blowing). Anyhow, it was in the kitchen of a supper club, over a stubborn pot that just wouldn't get clean. A ferocious alfredo sauce clung to that pot for dear life and it took the dedication of two men to relieve of it's unsanitary post. Two men whose lives would never be the same from that day forward. Two men who could believe in the charisma and tenacity the other wielded so greatly that they foolishly believed that they just might amount to something. It was a fateful day to be sure. A fateful day indeed. A day that gave birth to The Dingbat Follies.


Cell Phone College

Written By: Alex Gordon/Chris Moses

Hi. I'm Dick DeVivo. I'd like to tell you about Cell Phone College. At Cell Phone College, you can drive and go to college at the same time. You can even go to the toilet while getting your degree. I know what you're thinking. College is for smart people. But you can trust me. I've got 20 years experience . . . as a moron. I'm just as stupid as you are. Dial in today and find out how Cell Phone College can change YOUR life.

MAN 1: Cell Phone College's Home Ec. class really changed the way that I eat lunch.

PHONE GUY: Spread the peanut butter now.

MAN 2: I could never tell the difference between a tablespoon and a teaspoon until I took Cell Phone College's "Going Metric" course.

PHONE GUY: It's the bigger one.

MAN 3: I never thought of myself as a scientist but thanks to Cell Phone College, I always know what time it is.

PHONE GUY: When the big hand is on the three, it's quarter past.

MAN 4: You don't understand, this is a big deal for me. Now I know how to lick a stamp. Thanks Cell Phone College!

PHONE GUY: Stick out your tongue now.

- I hope our commercial inspired you. Operators are standing by right now to help you improve your life with Cell Phone College. So call now and get some college.

Cell Phone College
Where You Don't Have To Be Smart.