The Hairbrain Scheme

The Hairbrain Scheme


The Hairbrain Scheme is a maniacal masquerade geared toward exploring new soundscapes and exciting performances. Their sound ranges from Carnival sing-along's to noise-induced anthems to Jerry Lee Lewis-esque, hyphen-induced orchestrations.


The Hairbrain Scheme is not merely a band. It’s a
demented, twisted, and addictive musical monstrosity. Since taking up arms in late 2004, the Santa Barbara-based quartet of Grant Parsons (vocals), Chris Nava (keyboard), Nate Harris (bass), and Bobby Halvorson (drums) has dazzled audiences across California with its infectious sound and electric
stage presence.

In an age where nearly every band claims to be pushing the boundaries of music, The Hairbrain Scheme offers a truly unique auditory experience that defies immediate categorization. Drawing comparisons to well-known acts like Devo, Frank Zappa, and Queen, the band’s music incorporates elements of jazz, hardcore, punk, new wave, indie rock, pop, electronica, and oldies. The end result is a fresh sound that’s conventional enough to keep heads bobbing, while simultaneously being bizarre enough to keep people scratching their heads.

This flavorful brand of music has quickly propelled The Hairbrain Scheme to the very forefront of the Santa Barbara music scene. In 2005, the band vanquished more than twenty other groups on their way to a decisive victory in the University of California at Santa Barbara’s Battle of the Bands. The band also made headlines by opening for such big-time acts as The Walkmen, Busta Rhymes, RJD2, 31 Knots, and Damien Marley.

It’s impossible to say precisely what’s next for The
Hairbrain Scheme, but one gets the feeling that this
fabulous foursome is on the cusp of something
tremendous. Stay tuned and see for yourself.
-Nick Pasto (UCSB Daily Nexus)


My Flabby Valentine

Written By: Grant Parsons

She's awfully big, but she smells real nice
She's a hot plate full of ice
She'll lay there like a lump for you
Seems somewhat of an oddity
Finding beauty in obesity
Flabby with two shirts on
She's huge...
I love her despite the weight.

Were it not for human taste buds
I would not have to date on
Wendy's weekday value specials
I'll be the floss in body folds
And everybody is looking their own way
But i think that they're mistaken
One look my heart was aching
For the recipe to salvage anything
That's lovestruck
Can't wind when your stomach's ruthless
Open refridgerator,
That's where I'll bet you'll find her
Sittin' with me by her side
Next to the Dreyer's
When the going gets tubby
We Eat!
When the Love strikes flabby!
Metabolize my source of warmth,
For this I'm sure
I love her despite the weight.


Written By: Grant Parsons

China's only if it's in shambles
A freedom fight with the bravest of bulls
Ramparts balk to the bridges they pass through
Kindled masts with idelible fuel
Katzenjammer and its dooly reprise
Can make a burning man seek to take the dust from his eyes
Blown up bases for the prim and the pride
The way they do in youth hostels
Say... everything's been vanquished
And I'm going solo on the wings of this medicine.
Wait... I was at this banquet eating Marco Polo
He had the stench of a gentleman.
Border sprawl on an electrical fence
When police stroll by just pretend to patrol
It's easier to remember the pack 'cuz
Kingdoms fall while attending the ball
Jog ten miles with a foot in your mouth
To know the difference between that and intangible gold
Rants are prevalent when the pictures are 'round
Exhale with all your eloquence
Say everything's been vanquished and I'm going solo
On the wings of this medicine
Wait... I was at this banquet eating Marco Polo
He had the stench of a gentleman.
Valets with superpowers that reign over all
The Brands, they will critique
Frowns waiting for the to-go sign
When armistice veils its bald head...
Sweat that runs across our eyes. Fleeting enzyme.
Wait I was in this blanket
And I was feeling so warm
In the din of this deadpan.

Jack the Dripper

Written By: Grant Parsons

So long surrealists
It's time to reinvent
Inflict your life upon no easal.
None had painted with a fiendish drop of paint.
All unconscious in a freeze frame of the brain.
Drink the cost of your trade.
Create a backdrop with a scheme that's on the page.
Bore the wretches who have brought old, bland precepts.
Volatile charm.
Deal on a whim.
Make "Proteen."
Talk will be cheap.

Every stroke from inside
Free-splattered surprise
"Deny the accident."
They multiply. How divine!
Lousy prime.
In order to lose
You must be stationery
Abstract with moving tact
Read the center with ease.


You're A Nation EP
Songs for No One demo

Set List

Spread Eagle Surprise
Death is Going to Kill Young People
High Standard Mortuary
Crack in the Streets/ Board
The Real Gateway Drug
Coastguard Sermon
Pecent Age
15 Year Old Burnt Pants
My Flabby Valentine*

*This song begins with a cover of My Funny Valentine.

The Hairbrain Scheme can play anywhere from 30-90 minutes.