Thievery & Liquor
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Thievery & Liquor


Band Rock Pop


This band hasn't logged any future gigs

This band hasn't logged any past gigs

This band has not uploaded any videos
This band has not uploaded any videos


The best kept secret in music


This band has no press


Kid Vegas & Good and not yet...


Feeling a bit camera shy


We are dynamic figures, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. We have been known to remodel train stations on our lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. We translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees. We write award-winning operas and manage time efficiently. We often tread water for three days at a time. We balance, we weave, we dodge, we frolic and all our bills are paid. On weekends, to let off steam, we participate in full contact origami. We woo men and women with our sensuous and godlike trombone playing and can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and we cook thirty-minute brownies in twenty minutes. We are experts in stucco, veterans in love, and outlaws in Peru. Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, we once single handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. We play bluegrass cello, the Russian Ballet scouted us, and we are the subject of numerous documentaries. When we are bored, we build suspension bridges in the yard. We enjoy urban hand gliding. On Wednesdays, after church, we repair electrical appliances free of charge. We're abstract artists, concrete analysts and ruthless bookies. Critics worldwide swoon over our original line of corduroy eveningwear. We don't perspire. We are private citizens, yet we receive fan mail. We have been caller number nine and have won weekend passes. Last summer we toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. We bat .400. Our deft floral arrangements have earned us fame in international botany circles. Children trust us. We can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. We once read Paradise lost, Moby Dick and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. We know the exact location of every food at the supermarket. We have performed several covert operations for the CIA. We sleep once a week; when we do sleep, we sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, we successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to us.