Wonk Unit

Wonk Unit formed about a million years ago in a place called Croydon in south London.

We wrote and recorded our album (Flying the Japanese Flag) in the first few months of being. It used to be called Wonk Unit Versus the Croydon Astronauts until I changed the artwork to me with my cock out, covered in menstrual blood. Yum. I am sorry to subject you all to my cock when you get the album. It was a phase I was going through.

We moved to Los Angeles a year or so back and had a good stint in the sun. This mainly involved me skating the sickest crete and romancing the Californian ladies. We are a touring band. We are doing it the old way, none of this spamming shit internet database fuck (well I hope not). We aim to play ever single fuckin' town and village in this place called the UK. Check the listings and come rep. I shit you not you'll see a better band doing the rounds. All that same old same old bollocks eh. Boring.

Come say hello. I have gold teeth and a smile to sink ships. Yup. Tell me what a cunt I am and i'll take it on board, change direction and start playing the same old shit that everyone else is doing. Mmmmm. Not.

We mix it up. We got the tunes,we got the looks, we got the spoken words. Yeah I like a sing song but check this I can fucking hit harder than any aggressive kid giving it the big one and not a tattoo in sight. I got chaos in my blood. I've lived by the sword and died by the sword and you know what? Fuck chaos.

Let's be positive here. I sing about love and life. I sing about the good shit that I know about and that ain't much, mainly pussy, but it's the truth. Love ya neighbours and greet people with a smile. That is our message. Ain't original but it serves me well.

WE DON'T SOUND LIKE YOUR AVERAGE OI BAND.

We like to do things our own way and if I get sucked off on stage, then all the better.